West Texas Safari '07
Well, it happened again. The 2nd annual West Texas Safari. Let me just start out by saying that the killing was not at all what I had expected. The weather was mostly to blame. 90s in the day and only in the 50s at night. But that didn’t stop us from having a little fun. My buddy Blanton decided to go and take his toys along.
It’s always good to have friends with toys.
We pulled out of College Station around 8:30pm. Mister “All-ya’ll-suck-cause-I’m-up-doing-stuff-by-my-self-while-ya’ll-sleep” Zeisloft made it almost 3 miles before we heard the first snore from the back seat. After many attempts at waking him, I told Blanton, “Look at the little fella….GOOD NIGHT NED!!!!!”
Anyway we rolled through the ranch gate at 3:00 am on November 7. A very short time after that we had all drifted off into la la land. The next day came very fast (5:00) and we were anxious to get up and go kill some camp meat. By that afternoon, we had returned to camp with only a couple of jack rabbits and some cactus parts. It was a pretty tough meal. Blanton ate gummy bears and M&Ms.
For the evening hunt, Blanton took off with his gummy bears to parts unknown and didn’t come back until dark. Z and I took the hunting truck and went after good camp meat. We rode around to the feeders trying to find quail or ringnecks or turkeys , or anything besides jack rabbit. We pulled up about 150 yds from one feeder, and a herd of turkeys lazily hopped over the fence and started walking off. That was their first mistake. Z and I had time to hop in the back and get set up on them with our 300mags. Since I hadn’t put blood on mine yet, I got the first shot. I judged the distance (poorly) and Z judged the wind (perfectly) and since my mag was sighted in at 300 yd, I had to aim at something entirely different than what I was shooting at. I was going for the ole middle of the neck shot. Turns out that I managed to blow all the skin off the top of the head without fracturing the skull. Chris and I drove up and the bird was just standing there neck up, but head down with a little blood dripping off the beak. We got out expecting him to take off at any moment, but we were able to walk right up to him and stand around trying to figure out exactly what happened. Once we figured it out, the bird was quickly dispatched.
Now we had camp meat. We headed back to start building a good dinner. At this point, I was dragging. I had slept less than 2 hours that night, and I needed some beauty rest. Blanton was in pretty much the same boat, but he had his gummy bears to give him a little extra energy. Z, who had slept at least 6 hours on the drive out, was raring to go. I said, “Why don’t we wait for Woody to get here, then we’ll have a beverage and head out for the night hunt.” So, we ate and sat around poking the fire for a bit. Come about 7:30 I was out. Blanton followed shortly. Then Z. Woody comes rolling in at around 10:00 to a dark camp and assumed we were all playing a joke on him until he steps out of the truck and hears all the snoring. So, he rolled his pack out and hit the sack as well.
Thursday morning, Blanton and the bears went to a turkey stand while Z, Woody and myself took the truck and did a little catching up. We had parked between two draws and there was a feeder in front of us. A perfect spot to take the ghost out of some critters…..Except, when old friends get together after a long time apart, they like to catch up, so we basically just sat and talked and wondered exactly how many gummy bears Blanton was eating at that moment. All of a sudden, we hear BOOM…whap…………BOOM…whap. We eyed each other knowing that he had put the bears down just long enough to eradicate two more birds. BOOM…….nothing. A miss? About 10 minutes go by and we are just fixing to go talk to him, when I look up and see antlers moving like lightning from one draw across the flat to the other. Although I never got glass on the deer, I would guess it to be a Muley in the 200+ range. It was confirmed later that it could be possible, because my cousin, who is the county game warden, said he and another warden had seen such a deer just a week before on the other side of the ranch. We spent some time to try and flush him out of the ditch to no avail. We met up with Blanton and come to find out, the two kill shots on the turkeys flushed a jack from one of its hidey holes and it didn’t make it to its next one.
After a quick lunch and a quick who-can-hit-the-primer-in-a-shotgun-shell-first competition (Woody beat us so bad it just wasn’t fun anymore), we set about to build our long-range shooting range. We set steels up at 500yd, 750yd, and 1000yd. By the time we had finished that, it was time for the evening hunt Blanton again went off with his pockets full of bears instead of bullets. Woody, Chris and I headed up the hill. This evening sucked a lot, so I’ll just skip forward to the night hunt.
Oh yeah…..the night hunt sucked a lot too. For some reason the varmints weren’t out. I suspect it was just too hot. And, because of the new moon, the rabbits weren’t out either.
Silence fell over the camp once again.
The next morning, it was Z’s turn in the turkey blind. Woody sat in another blind, I drove around and way-laid some rabbits, and Blanton alternated between sleeping and eating gummy bears. It came time to pick woody up, and after hearing his story, someone needs to teach him how to hunt out of a stand. Here is his account as best as I can remember it.
“So there I was. At first light, I saw some sheep working over to the east a bit. Did Alan say shoot the sheep, or don’t shoot the sheep? I know we can shoot a goat. Oh well, I’ll shoot the sheep. So I climbed out of my stand and went over to see if I could get a shot at a big ram that was in with the flock. Just as I was getting in range, I heard turkeys gobbling back toward the feeder. I hauled ass back to the stand and climbed up and sat down. About 5 minutes later I saw some turkeys off to the west, so again I climbed out of the stand and went chasing after them. I didn’t get one, so back to the stand I went. A little later, I saw a big white-tail buck working out in the brush. I was going to climb down and go chase it away too, but it was working toward Chris, and I didn’t want to spook it.”
After telling the story, we pulled up to Z’s stand and I could see 2 birds on the ground, and there was a third a little ways off. Nothing exciting, just a typical Chris job. Chris goes in the stand. Critters walk out. Chris pulls the trigger 3 times. 3 critters die.
Lunch. Then someone finally figured out that the horrendous smell emanating from our camp site was actually us. No one had taken a shower since Monday, and it was now Friday. The day was hot…about 90 degrees, and the water tank looked very refreshing. The only problem was that the water was just about .000000000000001degrees above freezing. Z and Woody wiggled their toes in it. I jumped all the way in since I stunk worse than anyone. (Note to self: Deodorant will burn the bottom hole like none other if you try and use it as soap.) Blanton ate gummy bears.
Long range time. Me, Z, Woody. Blanton was on another hillside eating….well, you know.
I’m up first at 500. BOOM…..miss. A quick adjustment for wind. BOOM…..dink. Center-punched the steel.
Woody’s up. BOOM……BOOM……BOOM……BOOM. All missed. (In his defense, Chris and I are using tactical high-powered scopes, and he isn’t. He is however looking hard for one now.)
Chris is up. BOOM……quick adjustment. BOOM…..dink. center punched the other target. Re-adjust to 750yd. BOOM……hold for wind. BOOM………………dink.
A brief pause to let the barrels cool and to lay out the field of fire for you…
You can’t really see it well, but if you look really close you will see white dots in each of the red circles. Two 12 inch targets at 500. One 18 inch target at 750, and one 18 inch target at 1000yd.
Me. 750. BOOM………………BOOM………………BOOM………………BOOM ………………nothing. Hot barrel.
Woody. 500. BOOM…….BOOM…….dink. Yeah!!!!!!! 750. BOOM……………… BOOM. Hot barrel.
Chris. 750. BOOM………………BOOM………………dink. Chris says, “OK, I’m going for 1000 on the first shot.” Woody and I look at each other and role our eyes. Chris has gotten too big for his pants again. Anyway, he gets all dialed in again. Holds for wind…BOOM……………………………………………………………Steve once said it best. “He pulled the trigger didn’t he?”
Time to quit making noise and glass the valley until dark. Blanton comes up about that time and says there is a heard of goats back up in the next canyon over and we should go get one. We were all set up to glass so we sent him after some good evening vittles. He’s equipped with the pirate gun (AR) and a 7mag. After a while we hear BOOM. Meat. About 30 minutes goes by and back up in the canyon we are hunting we hear BOOM…BOOM..BOOMBOOMBOOM………….BOOM……………………BOOM
Damn, Blanton. We can only eat one.
That evening, Blanton roles up, and through a mouth full of gummy bears, regales us of his story. Turns out, he really under-estimated the wildness of our goats. We have a rule that we only shoot goats in the head, and it just so happens that on the first shot, Blanton hit the jaw of one at about 200 yards. He then had to spend the evening chasing the herd to make the kill. Finally about an hour and a half and 2 miles later, he managed to down the wounded beast back in the deepest canyon we have with no roads. He was about ¾ mile from the 4-wheeler, and it was near dark, so, that one unfortunately got wasted. Turkey again.
No night hunt.
Saturday, Woody had to leave, so he went and sat in a stand. The rest of us just went on a drive hunt. Nothing. When we got back to camp, we found a farewell note that woody had left along with his part of the grocery bill. (A picture is coming next week Blanton has it, and he is in New Mexico bear hunting this week)
After Lunch, Blanton Chris and I re-painted all the steels and headed up the hill to the long range spot. Cross wind 5-8mph.
Me. 500. BOOM…BOOM….ding. BOOM…BOOM…ding.
Blanton. 300. 22LR. POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…ding. POP…POP…POP…POP
Blanton. 500. AR. Boom…..boom……boom……boom….ding
Blanton. 500 7mag. BOOM……….BOOM…..BOOM…..nothing
Chris. 750. BOOM……BOOM…..ding. BOOM…..ding. BOOM…..miss
Just as he stopped shooting, I took my eye off the spotting scope and noticed a large porcupine ambling off toward the edge of the hill. It was just enough interlude to allow our guns to cool.
Me. 750. BOOM…..BOOM…..BOOM….ding.
Me. 500. BOOM…ding.
Blanton. 500. AR. Boom…boom….boom…..ding. Boom….ding. boomboomboom…..dingdingding. boom….boom…..ding (VERY IMPRESSIVE)
Blanton 750. AR. Many shots one ding. Also impressive. Just a mildot scope no adjustments.
Blanton 500 7mag. BOOM….BOOM…ding
Blanton 750. 7mag. I’m not sure he hit it. Chris? Blanton?
Chris. 1000. BOOM….BOOM…BOOM…..ding. BOOM……..miss.
Time to hunt. After spotting for about an hour, we had seen 5 or 6 does, but nothing to shoot. Then all of a sudden from Chris….”UGHHHUUUUUHH A UGHG M*!@# *&^% QOYTQO ALNAPCKSN…………………MOUNTAIN LION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I guess he forgot how to talk for a while, but he did it really loud. I thought our porcupine had come back and slapped him across the mouth. In about half a second, we had two 300mags, a 7mag, an AR, a 60 power spotting scope and 2 pairs of binoculars deployed to that side of the hill. Chris was the only one that saw it. Unfortunately he tried to switch from the spotting scope to the rifle just as the cat was going in some trees. We lost it.
The night hunt produced 3 rabbits.
Sunday. Wake up. Pack up. Saddle up. Go home. We had to go retrieve all our optics from the long range spot, so while we were there, we decided to launch a few more rounds. This time the cross wind was about 10mph.
Me. 1000yd. BOOM…….adjust. BOOM……a little more. BOOM………ding
Me. 750yd. BOOM…….ding
Me. 500yd. BOOM……knicked it. BOOM…..miss by a mile. Hot barrel.
Chris 1000yd. BOOM……..BOOM……….BOOM……ding. BOOM…………BOOM………BOOM………..BOOM……ding.
Time to head back to Houston.
Happy trails to all ya’ll. Hope your hunting season is filled with great stories and clean kills.
It’s always good to have friends with toys.We pulled out of College Station around 8:30pm. Mister “All-ya’ll-suck-cause-I’m-up-doing-stuff-by-my-self-while-ya’ll-sleep” Zeisloft made it almost 3 miles before we heard the first snore from the back seat. After many attempts at waking him, I told Blanton, “Look at the little fella….GOOD NIGHT NED!!!!!”
Anyway we rolled through the ranch gate at 3:00 am on November 7. A very short time after that we had all drifted off into la la land. The next day came very fast (5:00) and we were anxious to get up and go kill some camp meat. By that afternoon, we had returned to camp with only a couple of jack rabbits and some cactus parts. It was a pretty tough meal. Blanton ate gummy bears and M&Ms.
For the evening hunt, Blanton took off with his gummy bears to parts unknown and didn’t come back until dark. Z and I took the hunting truck and went after good camp meat. We rode around to the feeders trying to find quail or ringnecks or turkeys , or anything besides jack rabbit. We pulled up about 150 yds from one feeder, and a herd of turkeys lazily hopped over the fence and started walking off. That was their first mistake. Z and I had time to hop in the back and get set up on them with our 300mags. Since I hadn’t put blood on mine yet, I got the first shot. I judged the distance (poorly) and Z judged the wind (perfectly) and since my mag was sighted in at 300 yd, I had to aim at something entirely different than what I was shooting at. I was going for the ole middle of the neck shot. Turns out that I managed to blow all the skin off the top of the head without fracturing the skull. Chris and I drove up and the bird was just standing there neck up, but head down with a little blood dripping off the beak. We got out expecting him to take off at any moment, but we were able to walk right up to him and stand around trying to figure out exactly what happened. Once we figured it out, the bird was quickly dispatched.Now we had camp meat. We headed back to start building a good dinner. At this point, I was dragging. I had slept less than 2 hours that night, and I needed some beauty rest. Blanton was in pretty much the same boat, but he had his gummy bears to give him a little extra energy. Z, who had slept at least 6 hours on the drive out, was raring to go. I said, “Why don’t we wait for Woody to get here, then we’ll have a beverage and head out for the night hunt.” So, we ate and sat around poking the fire for a bit. Come about 7:30 I was out. Blanton followed shortly. Then Z. Woody comes rolling in at around 10:00 to a dark camp and assumed we were all playing a joke on him until he steps out of the truck and hears all the snoring. So, he rolled his pack out and hit the sack as well.
Thursday morning, Blanton and the bears went to a turkey stand while Z, Woody and myself took the truck and did a little catching up. We had parked between two draws and there was a feeder in front of us. A perfect spot to take the ghost out of some critters…..Except, when old friends get together after a long time apart, they like to catch up, so we basically just sat and talked and wondered exactly how many gummy bears Blanton was eating at that moment. All of a sudden, we hear BOOM…whap…………BOOM…whap. We eyed each other knowing that he had put the bears down just long enough to eradicate two more birds. BOOM…….nothing. A miss? About 10 minutes go by and we are just fixing to go talk to him, when I look up and see antlers moving like lightning from one draw across the flat to the other. Although I never got glass on the deer, I would guess it to be a Muley in the 200+ range. It was confirmed later that it could be possible, because my cousin, who is the county game warden, said he and another warden had seen such a deer just a week before on the other side of the ranch. We spent some time to try and flush him out of the ditch to no avail. We met up with Blanton and come to find out, the two kill shots on the turkeys flushed a jack from one of its hidey holes and it didn’t make it to its next one.
After a quick lunch and a quick who-can-hit-the-primer-in-a-shotgun-shell-first competition (Woody beat us so bad it just wasn’t fun anymore), we set about to build our long-range shooting range. We set steels up at 500yd, 750yd, and 1000yd. By the time we had finished that, it was time for the evening hunt Blanton again went off with his pockets full of bears instead of bullets. Woody, Chris and I headed up the hill. This evening sucked a lot, so I’ll just skip forward to the night hunt.
Oh yeah…..the night hunt sucked a lot too. For some reason the varmints weren’t out. I suspect it was just too hot. And, because of the new moon, the rabbits weren’t out either.
Silence fell over the camp once again.
The next morning, it was Z’s turn in the turkey blind. Woody sat in another blind, I drove around and way-laid some rabbits, and Blanton alternated between sleeping and eating gummy bears. It came time to pick woody up, and after hearing his story, someone needs to teach him how to hunt out of a stand. Here is his account as best as I can remember it.
“So there I was. At first light, I saw some sheep working over to the east a bit. Did Alan say shoot the sheep, or don’t shoot the sheep? I know we can shoot a goat. Oh well, I’ll shoot the sheep. So I climbed out of my stand and went over to see if I could get a shot at a big ram that was in with the flock. Just as I was getting in range, I heard turkeys gobbling back toward the feeder. I hauled ass back to the stand and climbed up and sat down. About 5 minutes later I saw some turkeys off to the west, so again I climbed out of the stand and went chasing after them. I didn’t get one, so back to the stand I went. A little later, I saw a big white-tail buck working out in the brush. I was going to climb down and go chase it away too, but it was working toward Chris, and I didn’t want to spook it.”
After telling the story, we pulled up to Z’s stand and I could see 2 birds on the ground, and there was a third a little ways off. Nothing exciting, just a typical Chris job. Chris goes in the stand. Critters walk out. Chris pulls the trigger 3 times. 3 critters die.
Lunch. Then someone finally figured out that the horrendous smell emanating from our camp site was actually us. No one had taken a shower since Monday, and it was now Friday. The day was hot…about 90 degrees, and the water tank looked very refreshing. The only problem was that the water was just about .000000000000001degrees above freezing. Z and Woody wiggled their toes in it. I jumped all the way in since I stunk worse than anyone. (Note to self: Deodorant will burn the bottom hole like none other if you try and use it as soap.) Blanton ate gummy bears.
Long range time. Me, Z, Woody. Blanton was on another hillside eating….well, you know.
I’m up first at 500. BOOM…..miss. A quick adjustment for wind. BOOM…..dink. Center-punched the steel.
Woody’s up. BOOM……BOOM……BOOM……BOOM. All missed. (In his defense, Chris and I are using tactical high-powered scopes, and he isn’t. He is however looking hard for one now.)
Chris is up. BOOM……quick adjustment. BOOM…..dink. center punched the other target. Re-adjust to 750yd. BOOM……hold for wind. BOOM………………dink.
A brief pause to let the barrels cool and to lay out the field of fire for you…
You can’t really see it well, but if you look really close you will see white dots in each of the red circles. Two 12 inch targets at 500. One 18 inch target at 750, and one 18 inch target at 1000yd.
Me. 750. BOOM………………BOOM………………BOOM………………BOOM ………………nothing. Hot barrel.
Woody. 500. BOOM…….BOOM…….dink. Yeah!!!!!!! 750. BOOM……………… BOOM. Hot barrel.
Chris. 750. BOOM………………BOOM………………dink. Chris says, “OK, I’m going for 1000 on the first shot.” Woody and I look at each other and role our eyes. Chris has gotten too big for his pants again. Anyway, he gets all dialed in again. Holds for wind…BOOM……………………………………………………………Steve once said it best. “He pulled the trigger didn’t he?”
Time to quit making noise and glass the valley until dark. Blanton comes up about that time and says there is a heard of goats back up in the next canyon over and we should go get one. We were all set up to glass so we sent him after some good evening vittles. He’s equipped with the pirate gun (AR) and a 7mag. After a while we hear BOOM. Meat. About 30 minutes goes by and back up in the canyon we are hunting we hear BOOM…BOOM..BOOMBOOMBOOM………….BOOM……………………BOOM
Damn, Blanton. We can only eat one.
That evening, Blanton roles up, and through a mouth full of gummy bears, regales us of his story. Turns out, he really under-estimated the wildness of our goats. We have a rule that we only shoot goats in the head, and it just so happens that on the first shot, Blanton hit the jaw of one at about 200 yards. He then had to spend the evening chasing the herd to make the kill. Finally about an hour and a half and 2 miles later, he managed to down the wounded beast back in the deepest canyon we have with no roads. He was about ¾ mile from the 4-wheeler, and it was near dark, so, that one unfortunately got wasted. Turkey again.
No night hunt.
Saturday, Woody had to leave, so he went and sat in a stand. The rest of us just went on a drive hunt. Nothing. When we got back to camp, we found a farewell note that woody had left along with his part of the grocery bill. (A picture is coming next week Blanton has it, and he is in New Mexico bear hunting this week)
After Lunch, Blanton Chris and I re-painted all the steels and headed up the hill to the long range spot. Cross wind 5-8mph.
Me. 500. BOOM…BOOM….ding. BOOM…BOOM…ding.
Blanton. 300. 22LR. POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…POP…ding. POP…POP…POP…POP
Blanton. 500. AR. Boom…..boom……boom……boom….ding
Blanton. 500 7mag. BOOM……….BOOM…..BOOM…..nothing
Chris. 750. BOOM……BOOM…..ding. BOOM…..ding. BOOM…..miss
Just as he stopped shooting, I took my eye off the spotting scope and noticed a large porcupine ambling off toward the edge of the hill. It was just enough interlude to allow our guns to cool.
Me. 750. BOOM…..BOOM…..BOOM….ding.
Me. 500. BOOM…ding.
Blanton. 500. AR. Boom…boom….boom…..ding. Boom….ding. boomboomboom…..dingdingding. boom….boom…..ding (VERY IMPRESSIVE)
Blanton 750. AR. Many shots one ding. Also impressive. Just a mildot scope no adjustments.
Blanton 500 7mag. BOOM….BOOM…ding
Blanton 750. 7mag. I’m not sure he hit it. Chris? Blanton?
Chris. 1000. BOOM….BOOM…BOOM…..ding. BOOM……..miss.
Time to hunt. After spotting for about an hour, we had seen 5 or 6 does, but nothing to shoot. Then all of a sudden from Chris….”UGHHHUUUUUHH A UGHG M*!@# *&^% QOYTQO ALNAPCKSN…………………MOUNTAIN LION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I guess he forgot how to talk for a while, but he did it really loud. I thought our porcupine had come back and slapped him across the mouth. In about half a second, we had two 300mags, a 7mag, an AR, a 60 power spotting scope and 2 pairs of binoculars deployed to that side of the hill. Chris was the only one that saw it. Unfortunately he tried to switch from the spotting scope to the rifle just as the cat was going in some trees. We lost it.
The night hunt produced 3 rabbits.
Sunday. Wake up. Pack up. Saddle up. Go home. We had to go retrieve all our optics from the long range spot, so while we were there, we decided to launch a few more rounds. This time the cross wind was about 10mph.
Me. 1000yd. BOOM…….adjust. BOOM……a little more. BOOM………ding
Me. 750yd. BOOM…….ding
Me. 500yd. BOOM……knicked it. BOOM…..miss by a mile. Hot barrel.
Chris 1000yd. BOOM……..BOOM……….BOOM……ding. BOOM…………BOOM………BOOM………..BOOM……ding.
Time to head back to Houston.
Happy trails to all ya’ll. Hope your hunting season is filled with great stories and clean kills.
posted by ~z | 2:25 PM
6 Comments:
Yes----It's alan posting on Z's name. Apparently I forgot my logon info.
Chris,
I read this and wanted to point out that it is a great compliment.
"Nothing exciting, just a typical Chris job. Chris goes in the stand. Critters walk out. Chris pulls the trigger 3 times. 3 critters die."
Perfection expected, Perfection delivered
yea, but come on...it fails to mention all 3 turkeys had head/high neck shots. The first one, sure no problem fairly static target, but the other pair, they were on the run and that is pretty fancy in my book. Throw a frickin dog a bone from time to time! What do I have to do, miss more?
Alan, good write, good read. I believe from now on you may be my official stenographer for hunting and fishing trips. Its a good gig, however you may need some assistance remembering some things, for example: when you got horrifically drunk and fell out of the truck on top of the mesa, or when you fell over while frantically shooting at quail, or when you got scared of the dark and began shooting for the light it provided. Not to mention when you then tried to kill Woody and me by driving off the mesa and through all the rough roads and heavy brush at top speed while Wood and me were in the high rack? If these don’t ring a bell, ask Woody. I seem to remember him saying “I have a wife and kids, I don’t wanna die like this!” But shy of the occasional oversight, a good read and a damn good time! Lookin forward to next year already.
Great report Alan. Aside from the near death experiences it sounds like an awesome trip.
I have to admit that after last year's massacre I was pulling for the animals a little bit this year :-)
How did the jack rabbit and cactus dinner turn out?
It made a turd.
quite a nice one as I recall
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